This weekend, my husband and I made a big change in our home. We decided to have the oldest and 2nd girl switch rooms. There are a number of reasons for this decision:
1) The oldest (Morgan), has had the privilege of having her own room for over 3 years now.
-She has decided that she doesn't want any kids playing in her room because she doesn't want it to get messy.
-She was told when she first got this room that it would double as the guest room anytime someone came to stay with us. At first, she was fine with this. But, recently, I have noticed a rotten attitude everytime I tell her that she has to give up her room.
-She plays in her sister's room all the time. Yet, she never thinks she should have to help with the cleaning because it's not her room.
-She has many things that are "hers" and not many things that are "ours".
2) The 2nd (Avery), has been sharing a room with Sydney for most of her life.
-She has never had the responsibility of cleaning a room all by herself with no help.
-She has been fighting non-stop (and I mean non-stop) with Sydney for the last couple of weeks.
-She takes for granted having someone in the room anytime she gets scared.
-She is used to sharing everything, but doesn't take ownership for anything.
Last week was just the last straw for me. I kept hearing fighting and biting words every 5 minutes overflowing from the shared room. I was an all day conversation monitor and I was exhausted. I also couldn't seem to keep that room clean for the life of me. Neither one of them EVER were the ones who made the mess and neither one of them have the attention span of more than 30 seconds. I felt like I was watching 2 two year olds.
So, right now the lessons are being learned by Morgan and Avery. Soon, Sydney will have a turn in the room alone. I am hoping that this will give both of them a little perspective and a more grateful attitude.
I know this is not going to be the magic wand of happiness waved in my home. But, I sure am hoping for a little assistance in my battle for harmony.
9 comments:
My two boys that share never own their mess either- it is always HIS. Can I blame my husband for my room? I can never have to clean it again.
I shared a room with my brother throughout most of my life. I guess that is part of being a twin. Even though we have the room, our two boys share a room. We think it helps teach them about community. And, if nothing else, it prepares them for living in the dorm room in college. It will be interesting to watch this community develop as they grow older, when the younger gets on the nerves of the older. Only time will tell
I'm the oldest, by quite a few years therefore always had my own room...and I'm quite positive I have major "ownership" issues with my space due to this..you are doing the right thing :) just ask rob...poor guy, I just keep trying to talk him into a king size bed!
Shouldn't Pastor Jon Dunwell be working on his sermon instead of reading your blog.
love amanda
Way to go mom!! I loved hearing this story on Sunday night at our small group! Thanks for sharing...it is always fun to hear how you handle things...I always learn from you! Hope things have been more peaceful this week! Love ya, Christie
P.S. If you are reading (or should I say stalking)this...I love you Amanda! :) Christie
What a great idea. . .way to be "bad" mom!
How's it going now?
And. . what's up with Jon actually COMMENTING on your blog? hilarious!
Brandi
hmm...so it's that easy? i hope that you can all sleep in peace!
We use to have that problem of cleaning the room until we enforced this solution--even and odd days...you can read about it on my blog--I just posted it a few days back
http://helpfulhomemaker.blogspot.com/2008/10/whos-day-is-it.html
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